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(Yellowtimes.org)
The following is a transcript of a recorded late-night
telephone call from an anonymous source claiming high-level
clearance at the Pentagon.
I
cannot vouch for its accuracy, but aspects of it seem
so plausible and so much in character for those now
running the White House and trying to run the world
that I regard it as vital enough information to bring
to the public's attention. It contains a chilling
tale.
It
all started immediately after September 11, indeed,
the very day that Bush disappeared on Air Force One
to pose for ten-thousand-dollar-a-pop campaign photos
of himself staring out a window somewhere over the
Atlantic while calling the executive chef on board
for another bag of pretzels. It was the same day Dick
Cheney went into hiding at Halliburton's Secure Executive
Golf Course somewhere on a banana plantation in Central
America.
At
the castle of the Republican Party's most important
multi-billionaire donor - as it happens, an exact
copy of mad King Ludwig's mountainside fantasy in
Bavaria - there is an underground laboratory where
the withered bits of his nasty body are kept alive
in vats of bubbling biological cocktails, resembling
the reddish blobs of a 1970s lava lamp. The blobs
are wired to a complex of supercomputers capable of
instant communication with any member of the Bush
cabinet. Other vats in the same laboratory maintain
bubbling bits of Ayn Rand, Walt Disney, Martin Bormann,
the Shah of Iran, and J. Edgar Hoover - each tank
anxiously awaiting its appointment with destiny for
rebirth.
This
is the world's finest private laboratory, expert in
the cloning of DNA, and it received a phone call from
Washington requesting immediate cooperation on a new
project. Scrapings of skin taken from the president's
elbow, taken by a team of surgeons treating him for
a bruise sustained while falling off his chair, were
being rushed by military jet to the site, immersed
in liquid nitrogen, even as the call came through.
The
request was to preserve the samples of the president,
as an additional line of defense against terrorism,
and to begin experiments with their cloning. The thinking
was along the lines of a second, third, or fourth
secret government being readied to step forward in
case of disaster, totally defeating the expectations
of any potential attacker. Depending on the success
of the tests, samples from Cheney, von Rumsfeld, Ashcroft,
and selected others would also be forwarded. The name
of the Secretary of State Powell was conspicuously
absent from the list.
Some
weeks later, the Pentagon called asking for delivery
of half the lab's sample, the president apparently
expressing unwillingness to again have his elbow scraped.
The lab was to continue its research into cloning
the president, but a new, second secret project was
to start immediately. Somewhere in the bowels of the
Pentagon's most secret weapons laboratory, the terrorist
attack had generated a revolutionary idea.
Von
Rumsfeld's chief expert on weapons of mass destruction
had hit upon an ingenious new concept. The president's
DNA would be replicated millions of times, and bits
of it would be imbedded into microscopic, synthetic
spores the Pentagon had been developing for years
as a vector for spreading germ warfare. These spores
could then be released in bombs designed to explode
harmlessly in the air over a target, creating a monstrous
aerosol cloud of spores for a radius of miles from
the detonation.
The
synthetic spores when inhaled, swallowed, or imbedded
in the flesh of humans were readily taken up by the
body, and the genetic material they contained would
spread in the fashion of a virus. Within a matter
of weeks, people exposed to these spores would begin
showing characteristics of the president.
Explode
enough of these bombs over any country whose behavior
was unacceptable, and, without killing a single person,
you could create in a matter of weeks an army of Bush-clones.
Smiling, bland zombies barely capable of earning a
living on their own, conspicuously displaying an unquestioning
obedience to orders.
Any
country thus exposed would be the Pentagon's for the
taking. Clearly, America's dear boys in uniform would
never again have to be put in harm's way. They could
just peacefully pursue their mail-order degrees in
hospitality management and refrigeration-repair technology
while relaxing with hot pizza and Playboy from the
PX and watching Pat Robertson on cable TV in off hours.
It
was a backwater politician's dream come true, pampering
the boys in the service, while conquering the world.
Indeed,
the thinking ran that it would not be necessary ever
again to occupy a country. Signals could be sent directly
to the leaders of any successfully-treated country
from the bubbling tank or from the Halliburton Secure
Golf Course with instructions on just how to conduct
their affairs. It was the fondest hope of the experimenters
that this particular characteristic, pliability to
taking orders from wealthy father figures, would be
among those successfully transplanted by the spores.
If
so, the possibilities were endless. America could
avoid any future contamination of its precious boys
to the devious ways of foreigners. Perhaps, the United
States could stop issuing passports altogether, an
idea much favored in Texas, and close all of its embassies
abroad. With benign, pliable populations spreading
across the planet, everything could be run from the
tanks or the plantation.
There
are concerns that certain transmitted characteristics
might prove a problem. Among these is the expected
severe dumbing-down of populations and their inability
to articulate clear language, but there is hope that
actual field tests of the spores will reveal ways
to manage these difficulties. American politicians
who know about the secret project actually are enthusiastic
about this possible outcome so that no one has to
listen to a "pukey fur'ener" again.
The
Pentagon believes, at least initially, that the spores
must be handled with extreme caution, comparable to
that used in the handling of thermo-nuclear weapons.
Their accidental release on home turf could pose a
grave threat, considering the country is in so dumbed-down
a state already. Again though, politicians in on the
project regard this possibility as less a threat than
a promising new horizon. The views from the vat on
this point are not yet known.
John
Chuckman encourages your comments: jchuckman@YellowTimes.org
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